I suppose there are worse things to have to be awakened by in the middle of the night than underwear. A few nights ago it was vomit, which I can handle. Well let me tell you, the Princess with her tiny little pea and fifty two mattresses has got nothin' on my little girl whose underwear wakes her up at midnight. I'm a light sleeper (a curse bestowed upon me the minute I gave birth; before that I could sleep through a freight train plowing through the living room) so when lights came on down the hallway, I got up to investigate.
Like 5-0 the questioning started...what's the problem? What do you mean they feel funny? Well, how many are you going to try on? No, they're all the same honey. What's wrong with that pair? The color's not right? The yellow ones? No, I don't know where they are. How about these? Too tight? Too loose? What do you mean one side rides up? Here, try these...what...no they're your sister's. Yes, they are clean! No they don't have her germs. No good, huh? Well what do you want me to do? Are you sure? You're kidding me, right? UUUGGGHHH!
Ultimately, we came full circle, back to the culprit that had rudely jolted my daughter from her peaceful slumber. See? They're better now, she says happily. I smile as I make my way back to bed. I absolutely understand her issues with underwear. It's hard to find a pair that fit just the way you like. I mean, there used to be like, two choices when it came to shopping for underwear, granny panties or thongs. Now there are briefs, boy cut, bikini, french, skimp skamp, thongs, lycra, cotton, Spanx, and the list goes on. I gave up trying to find the perfect pair of underwear when I went looking for my favorite brand, and they were gone. You may as well have slapped me right in the face. Look, if somethings not broke, don't go trying to fix it, right? So, until they raise my favorite underwear from the dead, I go commando!
Like 5-0 the questioning started...what's the problem? What do you mean they feel funny? Well, how many are you going to try on? No, they're all the same honey. What's wrong with that pair? The color's not right? The yellow ones? No, I don't know where they are. How about these? Too tight? Too loose? What do you mean one side rides up? Here, try these...what...no they're your sister's. Yes, they are clean! No they don't have her germs. No good, huh? Well what do you want me to do? Are you sure? You're kidding me, right? UUUGGGHHH!
Ultimately, we came full circle, back to the culprit that had rudely jolted my daughter from her peaceful slumber. See? They're better now, she says happily. I smile as I make my way back to bed. I absolutely understand her issues with underwear. It's hard to find a pair that fit just the way you like. I mean, there used to be like, two choices when it came to shopping for underwear, granny panties or thongs. Now there are briefs, boy cut, bikini, french, skimp skamp, thongs, lycra, cotton, Spanx, and the list goes on. I gave up trying to find the perfect pair of underwear when I went looking for my favorite brand, and they were gone. You may as well have slapped me right in the face. Look, if somethings not broke, don't go trying to fix it, right? So, until they raise my favorite underwear from the dead, I go commando!
HAHAHAHAHA!! That is so true. I only wear half the underwear in my drawer because the other half bug me for some reason. Great job on the blog, Traci! Hollis
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