Fake It To Make It

Anton Chekhov once said...Any idiot can face a crisis, it's the day to day living that wears you out...and a hundred years later those words still ring true. It is especially true for me personally in so many ways as I try to find my footing, and adjust to being on my own. Now more than ever, my children look to me for support, guidance, security and reassurance. When you have to put your groceries on a credit card, because there's only twenty bucks in the checking account for the next week, you learn how to fake it. It's hard maintaining that, day...after day...after day, but I manage to somehow. It's hard to set aside worry, stress and anxiety and choose to walk in faith...but that's what I'm living every single day. I know that if I fixate on all the the things "wrong" with my life, it will consume me. There have been times when it almost has. So...I wake up every morning and put a smile on my face, even on the days when I don't feel like smiling...particularly on those days...again, faking it. I have been blessed with the wisdom that all I have is right now, this moment. How I choose to live this moment is a gift I give myself, as well as my children. Their unbridled laughter these last few days have been music to my ears...a healing elixir for my soul. It is in those moments that my worn out soul is refreshed, and I know I can make it another day.