Goldfish

It's hard devoting yourself full time to your passion, only to feel like you're stuck in a fever dream, running in place, getting absolutely nowhere. You start asking yourself if it's really worth it.

Managing sixteen, yes sixteen, social media platforms with little if any interaction is demoralizing. Begging for followers and book reviews, when you can't even get "likes" and "shares" is humiliating. Publishers today, especially the big five, want to see that you have a decent following—it's easier for an "influencer" to get a book deal (even if the writing is sub-par), than it is for someone like me, a nobody in the virtual world.

I know that even as I write this—nobody cares. We are drowning in a new virtual reality where the average human attention span is just eight seconds, which, depending on how fast you read or how little fucks you give, I've lost you already. Goldfish can pay attention longer.

I've got good stories in me, stories worth telling. Do I keep fighting the good fight, or do I throw in the towel? It's a rhetorical question really, because clearly, no one is listening. Recently I heard someone say of their success...I always thought I could, so I did. He lead the team that taught goldfish to drive the new "fish operated vehicle," or something like that, I wasn't paying attention.